This Driving Thing is Not For Me

Nope, third time is definitely not the charm. Of course, it would have been, but my tester didn't ding me for every tiny little mistake. Like apparently not turning my wheels in the right direction when preparing to make a turn. I'm turning. Of course my wheels will be in the right direction when I make the turn!

So I'm annoyed. Very annoyed. Apparently I did great this time around. No dangerous incidences, no rule violations. Nothing that would actually fail me. Except the five times I didn't do a shoulder check over my right shoulder, and the two times I didn't do a 360. Oh, and not being perfectly spaced in my back up parking job. Even though it was a beautiful parking job.

At some point, you have to just blame the tester. The first two tests, my failure was definitely my fault. I know what I did wrong, and I agreed. I made efforts to correct thought failures, and I did them perfectly this time around. And still failed.

For perspective, I'm driving a standard, and it's pouring with rain for the first time in a few weeks. The roads are a little slippery, but not too bad. At one point, I was on a shallow hill (think a bully run on a ski slope), and because there was a car behind me, I put on a bit more gas than I usually would so that I would not hit the car. Unfortunately, because of the rain and the wet roads, I just burn out a bit. I got going, no skidding, no hazards, no hitting people. Everything was fine. No one was in danger, and no one should ever be in danger just because I burned out a bit. But of course, I get dinged. Because it's not perfect.

I would like to see every driver have to go in and take their full license road test again every ten years. That would definitely weed out the actually dangerous and stupid people. Not the poor souls who don't look over their shoulder a few times, and who burn out a couple times. Even as I was taking the test, there were two people who didn't use their signal. And not even for minor things. I was sitting at an intersection, waiting to turn left because there was a car sitting across from me. He had no signal on, so I assumed he was going straight. Nope. He turned left. And I wouldn't be surprised if I got dinged for waiting too long at the light.

And then at the end, when the tester was telling me what I did wrong, she actually said I was going too slow in a residential area. Okay, I understand, if the road is clear and there's not really a risk of kids running out, or hidden driveways, I can go a bit faster. But she actually said that I should go 40, and judge for myself when I can go faster or slower in a residential area. Bear in mind, the roads were slick, and the particular road I was on when she asked me the speed limit was small, with cars on both sides, on a hill with patchwork paving. It was not a safe road, and not one I would feel comfortable going 50kph on, even with perfect conditions.

During the test I did a decent parallel park. I had to restart and do it again when I couldn't the first time. I made sure to always check over my shoulder, and in all my mirrors before I pulled out or backed up.

When I did just the plain backing up part, I looked around, and carefully backed up. There was a car poking out of a driveway that was in my way, and even though she didn't tell me to stop, I did. I was aware that there was something there.

When she asked me to pull over and open my door, I shoulder checked, and looked in my mirror to make sure that no one was coming, then opened my door.

I used all my signals, though I may have forgotten to turn it back on when I had to correct my parallel parking job.

In other words, I did all the most important things near perfectly. But I guess they have to meet their 'fail' quota for the day, and I was just one of the unlucky ones this time.

At this point, I've stopped caring. I hate driving. I have since I first opened the book to study for my L test. I will never be the type of person that likes to drive. It will never relax me, and I will never willingly drive a long road trip unless the destination is worth it. If it wasn't expected of me, and if our transit system wasn't so bad, I would be more than happy to never get behind the wheel of a car again.

I'm not normally the person to just give up, and I'm not in this case either. I will very grudgingly continue to drive, just because I have to.

Third Time

I have my third N test tomorrow. I'm really hoping the saying 'third times the charge' will work out for me. I practiced my parallel parking yesterday, so hopefully that'll go better. I think I should be fine... Maybe. There'll always be things that can mess me up, I just have to hope that those things don't pop up tomorrow. What I'm most concerned about are playground zones. Now that school is out, I'm not completely sure what are playground zones, and what are just school zones. And now they've thrown summer school into the mix, but that might be over by now, but I'm not sure. There was summer school at the school near my house, but it seems to be over now, but I'm not sure if that's the case for all schools, or if they're scattering the days that there's summer school.

Okay, maybe I'm just a little nervous. I guess I just have to go, feel confident, and hope I get a nice tester.

Disappointed, but Hopeful

I was hoping to post some good news, but it looks like that might have to wait a few more weeks. I failed my N test. It still makes me cringe to think of that. It makes my head hurt and my mind start punching itself. It makes me want to hide in a room and ignore everyone. For anyone that knows me, they will understand how much it means when I say that I cried.

I don't fail. Not with important stuff. That's not to say that I'm an over achiever. I'm one of those lucky people that can kind of coast by with minimal practice or studying. I do fairly well with school and work. When it comes to crunch time, I will hate myself, but I can normally keep calm enough to get through everything.

I stalled my car before I even got out of the parking lot. I forgot to take the emergency brake off. Luckily, my tester seemed pretty easy going. If I had not made one major mistake, I would have passed, despite occasionally forgetting my signal, or to shoulder check. The really embarrassing part, is that this is the exact same mistake my sister made.

I was near the end, driving through back streets. These back streets are weird. It'll be a complete through road, until one intersection, where there will be a stop sign. This wasn't the problem. I knew there was a stop sign there, so I stopped. I looked left, right, left again. I didn't easy forward though, and there were trees blocking part of my view to my right. So I went.

And this is where that easy luck failed me. Normally luck corrects my mistakes, but I think by this point I had used it all up. Well, most of it. I didn't get hit, I didn't even scratch my car, or any car! However, there was a car on the through road that put me into a dangerous situation. Had it been going faster, I would have been hit.

At the end of the test, the tester told me that he was impressed with my gear shifting, which was probably the most surprising to me. I made sure that I never shifted gears in an intersection or while turning. The car sounded horrible. But I guess he's probably heard and seen worse.

What I am most proud of is my backing in. From my previous posts, everyone should know that this is what I was most worried about. When we got back to the parking lot, there were very few spots available. I picked one right next to a large van, because the only other ones were either too close to the entrance, or they were in the corner, where I couldn't get into. Even worse, the owners of the truck were sitting inside it, watching as I was backing up right next to them. I actually managed to pull in, with minimal correcting, and with no contact with other cars (or people). It was straight, if a little tight. I blame that on the fact that I was parking right next to a massive truck though, which was really close to the line. I really with I had thought to take a picture, to prove that I did it.

So after my hour or so of self loathing and wallowing in my pit of pity, I think I can finally come to terms with this. Driving is not my strong suit. I don't like driving. It's not something I can be proud of. I know a lot of people believed that I could do it, but I learned years ago to never trust people in this way. The nature of friends is to comfort and support. Even if they had an inkling of doubt, they would never say it. And I'm okay with this. I don't feel like I let anyone down except myself. And I know that my friends will still continue to comfort and support me.

Next time guys! I swear. I can only get better from here.

Unreliability is Just the Worst

I hate unreliable people. I really, really hate them. It's not too bad when it's something casual, like hanging out with friends, but when it comes to work... Please, anyone trying to get a job, or even has a job, you will be everyone's best friend at work is you actually show up for the shifts you're scheduled for. You'll even be liked if you call a week ahead for a day you can't work. But two days before a shift that can't be filled? Big no! Especially if your poor manager is dealing with inventory and a driving test at the same time!

And rant over. On another note, I'm still freaking out about my driving test. I've talked to a bunch of people, and they all said pretty much the same thing; shoulder check, stay at a consistent speed, watch out for playground zones, and be careful when the tester asks you to pull over for a hazard check. Oh, and don't freak out... Still, I'm feeling a bit better. I'm still horrible at backing up, but I've never actually done it with cars on either side of the spot. I think it might be a bit easier, because I'll have something to tell if I'm straight or not. For now, my dad just stands where the edge of the car would be, but he's just a point, not a line, so I can't tell if I'm straight in the spot. However, I can barely see anything out of the back of my car, because the windows are small and I'm kind of short (well, average height, but the car is big.) So I'm kind of nervous that I won't be able to see the car I'm parking next to until after I have to turn. And of course, the car I'm driving on seems to have a horrible turning radius. I'm not sure if it's normal, but when I crank the wheel, it only goes around once before stopping. This doesn't seem like much, and the car makes a wide turn. 

But we'll see how it goes. At least I'm more confident about inventory at work. I was given a walk through, and I've been promised help if I need any, so I think I can do this. It's just going to be a very long week, especially if I have to fill in for someone who is the cause of the above rant... 

Adulthood

My driving test is coming up in a week, and I'm kind of freaking out. How do people learn to park! Why do people back into parking spots? You're just making it a requirement for us to do so! And I've done barely any practicing, because I hate driving and I'm trying to avoid it like the plague, but I have to grow up and be an adult.

Being an adult is hard. Can I just go back to being a kid now?

Life Update

I feel like I should have a lot to post, but nothing is coming to me. So I'm just going to post a quick life update.

I'm well on my way to becoming assistant manager. I think I should be done within a couple weeks. At least, I hope so. My manager is going on vacation during spring break, so I'll be in charge. I know the important things, but it'll always be good to be done with my training.

I'm halfway done with my class. The last few assignments have been difficult, because they required the computer and fancy programs that I've either never used, or haven't used since high school (this makes me feel old...) Not to mention computers hate me, and I missed an important class because of the flu. Looks like we've moved on to short stories though, at least for now. I might post what I've written later, but it's a very short version of a longer story I'm writing.

I'm not a terrible driver anymore! I can't remember if I ever complained about driving here (I must have at some point), but I've been learning on a standard. It was much harder before because I was learning in a small car with no power steering or anything fancy. My parents got a new car though, and I've been driving it. It has power steering, which has been really nice. It's just as hard to back into a parking spot or parallel park though.

I've been wasting my time walking shows on Netflix. I found a really cool one called The Guild. It's pretty much perfect. It's a nerd show, based around a bunch of people who play an RPG. Each show is about an hour and a half long, but consists of the whole season. I was excited to see six seasons, before I realized that there was only one show in each season and I had watched them all.
I've also been watching Continuum, which is different from what I normally watch. It's cool though, because it's set in Vancouver, and as far as I know, it's the only show like that. Most shows are set in New York, or Chicago, or some other big American city.
And finally, Pokemon. It was my love when I was younger, but i rarely got to watch it because we didn't have cable. Then when we finally got cable, I was too old to watch it without being embarrassed. Now it's on Netflix, and I just don't give a shit about what other people think. It helps that a bunch of my friends are addicted with Pokemon too.